Why impostor feelings can hit neurodivergent people harder

You finish the work. Someone says you did well. Instead of feeling pleased, you start listing reasons it does not count. Perhaps you were lucky. Perhaps the deadline made you move. Perhaps the other person has not seen how much effort it took. That gap between what you achieved and what you let yourself believe is the subject of the video above.

I want to be careful with the language. “Impostor syndrome” is a familiar phrase, but the original researchers called it the impostor phenomenon. It describes a pattern of doubting your competence or explaining away success despite evidence that you have done something well. It is not a diagnosis, and it does not mean the person actually lacks skill. It also does not mean every neurodivergent person feels this way.

In this Coffee 5, I talk about the standards that make some people feel their work does not count: how long they sat still, whether they made eye contact, whether they used the “right” planner, and whether their route to the result looked like everybody else's. The video is short. This page takes time to separate the feeling from the evidence and look at what might help.

Where the term came from

Psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes described the impostor phenomenon in a 1978 paper on high-achieving women. The women they studied had accomplishments, yet struggled to internalize them. A success could be attributed to luck, extra effort, or other people's mistaken judgment. The paper did not establish that only women experience the phenomenon, or that one cause explains it for everyone.

Later research has looked at different groups and settings. A systematic review of impostor syndrome studies found that estimates vary enormously depending on who is studied and how the experience is measured. So I would not put a neat percentage on neurodivergent people's experiences or claim we all have it. The pattern is recognizable; its prevalence and causes are not settled by a single statistic.

The word “syndrome” can also suggest that the problem lives entirely inside the individual. Sometimes self-doubt is part of the story. Sometimes a person is responding to an environment that really has judged their communication, timing, sensory needs or working style unfairly. Both deserve to be taken seriously. Telling someone simply to “believe in yourself” can miss the conditions they are living in.

The hidden cost of looking capable

A finished project is visible. The reminders, rehearsals, workarounds, rechecking and recovery time may not be. If you have ADHD, you might deliver a thoughtful piece of work while struggling with the steps needed to start it. If you are autistic, you might be clear and direct about a problem but spend the rest of the day replaying whether your tone was read as wrong. If you are dyslexic, an idea may be strong even when a spelling error gets noticed first.

Those are possibilities, not traits assigned to everyone with those labels. Individuals vary. The important point is that a narrow measure of professionalism can confuse one way of performing a task with competence itself. If the feedback you receive is mostly about the part you find difficult, it is easy to discount the contribution that made the work valuable.

This does not make all criticism unfair. Specific, constructive feedback can help. The distinction is between feedback about an outcome and a repeated message that your natural way of thinking or communicating is the problem. A person can work on a skill without accepting that their whole identity is defective.

Why praise can be hard to take in

An achievement may have come after so much effort that praise feels as if it belongs to somebody else's version of the story. You remember the missed appointment, the last-minute rush, or the help you needed. They see the result. Both accounts can be true. Needing support does not cancel your part in what you accomplished.

There is a perfectionism trap here too. If your standard is “I would have done it without help, stress, errors or a different route,” then almost any real accomplishment can be disqualified. A useful test is whether you would apply the same rule to a colleague. If their finished work would count even though they used a checklist or asked a question, why would yours not count?

Try to notice the exact sentence your doubt uses. “I got lucky” is different from “I was prepared and an opportunity came up.” “Anyone could have done it” is different from “someone else might also have been able to do it.” You do not have to turn a success into a claim that you are brilliant at everything. You can simply give it the weight it earned.

Masking and the question of belonging

Masking can mean changing or concealing parts of your behavior to meet social expectations or avoid negative reactions. Research on autistic and ADHD adults is still developing, and experiences differ, but a study of diagnosis acceptance and masking examines the effort involved. When you have had to edit yourself repeatedly, praise for the edited version may not feel reassuring. You may wonder whether people value your work, the performance of fitting in, or both.

Disclosure is a personal decision with practical consequences. Nobody owes an employer, class or audience a private explanation simply to make their work count. You can ask for a clearer instruction, a written priority, a quieter setting or more predictable feedback without turning every conversation into a statement about your diagnosis. Where support is available, you can decide what to share and with whom.

The video says impostor feelings can grow when society rewards a narrow picture of productivity and communication. I agree that environments matter. But it would be too simple to say every doubt is caused by bias, or that a single strength is guaranteed by a diagnosis. We can name unfair standards while still looking honestly at individual circumstances, skills and support needs.

Separate the evidence from the story

Take one achievement you have dismissed. Write two columns. In the first, put observable facts: what was needed, what you did, what changed, and what feedback you actually received. In the second, put interpretations: “They were only being kind,” “I should have done it faster,” or “It does not count because I needed help.” The point is not to force a positive spin. It is to stop an interpretation from posing as a fact.

Ask what evidence would change your mind. If no amount of work or external feedback could count, the rule may be impossible to satisfy. If you did make a mistake, name that mistake specifically. A fixable error can coexist with competence. “This paragraph needed correcting” is more useful than “I am a fraud.”

Keep a small record of completed work and the conditions that helped. That could be a note on your phone, a folder of feedback, or a list you revisit before a review. Include the practical supports: a colleague who clarified a brief, a deadline that helped, a template that reduced friction. Those are part of how work gets done, not hidden proof that you did not earn the result.

Make feedback more useful

Broad praise can feel hard to believe. Ask a trusted person what specifically worked: the decision, the explanation, the design, the research, or the way you handled a difficult moment. Specific evidence is easier to use than “You are amazing.” The same goes for criticism. Ask which part needs changing and what success would look like next time.

Managers and colleagues have a role here. If you only reward the person who speaks most confidently in a meeting, you may miss the person who found a flaw in the process or prepared the clearest written analysis. Make the criteria for good work explicit. Give feedback on the work, not a vague impression of how “normal” the person appeared while producing it. A useful environment should make it possible to contribute without first passing an invisible personality test.

Connection can help too. Hearing another person describe the effort behind an apparently easy achievement can loosen the idea that you alone are struggling. Choose spaces where you can speak without having to perform certainty. If your doubts are persistent or cause significant distress, a qualified mental health professional can help you explore them. An article cannot diagnose the cause or replace that support.

A more honest way to move forward

The video asks you to name one strength and hold on to it. I would make that concrete: choose something you have actually done. Maybe you spotted a pattern, asked the question no one else had asked, made a complicated idea clearer, or stayed with a problem long enough to solve it. You do not have to claim that everyone with your diagnosis shares that strength. It is yours because there is evidence in your own work.

You are allowed to have areas of difficulty and areas of ability at the same time. You are allowed to use support and still own your contribution. You are allowed to question an unfair standard without pretending every challenge disappears. None of those statements requires you to win an argument about whether you “really” belong. They offer a more accurate account of the work you have already done.

Questions people ask

Is impostor syndrome a medical diagnosis?

No. The impostor phenomenon describes a pattern of self-doubt about competence despite evidence of achievement. It is not a formal diagnosis. If the feelings are persistent or distressing, a health professional can help explore what else may be involved.

Are neurodivergent people more likely to have impostor feelings?

Some research explores the relationship, but the evidence does not support a universal claim about every neurodivergent group. Experiences and environments differ. It is safer to ask what feedback, expectations and supports shape a particular person's doubts.

Does needing accommodations mean I did not earn my success?

No. A support can remove an unnecessary barrier to doing the work. Look at the contribution you made and the result, just as you would for somebody who used ordinary tools, colleagues or clear instructions.

What can I do when praise feels undeserved?

Ask for specifics, record the observable work you did, and notice the rule you are using to dismiss it. You need not force yourself to feel confident immediately. Start by giving the evidence a fair hearing.

Sources and related watching

• Clance and Imes, original 1978 paper — where the term was introduced.
• Systematic review of impostor phenomenon studies — why prevalence claims need caution.
• Research on diagnosis acceptance and masking — one study, with limits, on experiences of masking.

For more on the hidden effort behind everyday work, watch the related pages below about ADHD stress and hidden effort, the cost of masking and feedback that feels personal.

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Related watching

• ADHD Stress and Hidden Effort
• The Hidden Cost of Masking
• Why Feedback Can Feel Personal